Orphans of femicide, the ignored victims

Patricia Mayorga, journalist. President of the World Association of Women Journalists and Writers – AMMPE-Italia

Femicide is the tragic epilogue of the millenary gender violence that affects women and girls of all religions, ethnicities and social classes, in all corners of the planet and that has especially marked the regional contexts of Latin America, where, for the first time, in reference to the elaborations of the criminologist Diane Russel, the term “femicide” was used in 2004 by the anthropologist Marcela Lagarde, theorist of this horrendous crime committed by men against women simply because they are women, to denounce and describe the massacre of women that had been ravaging the city of Juarez since the 1990s, the birthplace of the poet Susana Chavez, murdered and mutilated in 2011.

“Ni una menos”, (Not one less), a verse of her poetry gave life and name to the feminist movement born in Argentina in 2015 and that has gone global against femicide and all forms of sexist and patriarchal violence. Thanks to feminist historians, and by direct testimonies, in reference to recent times, we know that violence against women’s bodies in armed conflicts has been, and continues to be, throughout the centuries, a weapon of war to humiliate and defeat the enemy people. Precisely in these terrible times of war, the murder of Susana Chávez recalls that of the Italian artist Pippa Bacca, raped and murdered in Turkey by a man who had taken her during the performance “Brides on tour”.

War and male violence against women have the same roots and are the poisonous and murderous fruit of patriarchy, which, through the sexual division of roles and the ambiguous relationship between love and violence, has built models and roles of ways of being women and men based on the hierarchy of the sexes, on the affirmation of an aggressive, powerful and omnipotent virility that for millennia has legitimized war and violence against women.

In Italy, despite the strengthening of punitive laws and the multiplication of initiatives to raise awareness against male violence, every three days a woman is killed by the man who claimed to love her, leaving her children orphaned. The tragic nature of the circumstance seriously affects their psychological balance, already marked by the suffering of their father’s violence towards their mother, which they have witnessed for years, and in many situations suffered, in the limits of their homes.

Domestic violence is more widespread than we think and know because the complicit silence of many family members and neighbours who know about it. The stories of domestic violence, according to the writer Guendalina di Sabatino, who wrote an interesting book on domestic violence “Chiamatela Venerdì” show how much violence persists and hides in the “sacred nest” of the family.

Unfortunately, we only become aware of it when it leads to femicide through a journalistic narrative that often minimizes responsibility and justifies the murderer, usually the victim’s partner.

Violence against women involves men first and foremost, which is why the male assumption of responsibility is fundamental. This type of domestic and gender-based violence is widespread throughout the world and mainly affects women and girls. What is most worrying is when it affects the most invisible: underage boys and girls, who on the one hand lose their mother to femicide, while their father (murderer) is imprisoned or commits suicide: in this situation their childhood is mutilated and they find themselves facing an uncertain future.

The sons and daughters of victims and perpetrators of femicide belong to one of the most vulnerable and forgotten groups of gender violence. They are exposed to a difficult scenario in which they do not always find real and effective protection from the State.

It is true that globally, progress has been made in respecting international treaties such as the Istanbul Convention and we are evolving in making all forms of gender-based violence visible, implementing public policies aimed at eradicating it; but one of the major problems affecting orphans of gender-based violence is invisibility.

For example, just to speak of Europe, currently, in most of the countries that make up the European Union, there is no official data on orphans of male violence. In fact, the data we have in our possession correspond to private organizations that fill this gap.

For this reason, it is essential to shed light on this drama that affects the most vulnerable and at the same time most ignored victims: the daughters and sons of the victims of feminicide, and as AMMPE Italy we will ask all the countries in which we have chapters of the World Association of Women Journalists and Writers (AMMPE World), regional bodies and even the United Nations, the establishment of a world day of mourning to make this tragedy visible and to reflect, in a responsible and competent manner, on this drama that, in addition to the direct victims on many occasions cuts short the lives of the daughters and sons of murdered mothers.

Establishing a National Day of Mourning to bring orphans of domestic crimes out of invisibility would force society as a whole to look the tragedy of femicides face to face. Perhaps, only their pain and loneliness would lead us to reflect and intervene with love, responsibility and competence on the violence that drives and destroys so many, too many families.